I’ve often been known when people ask me if I “believe” in whichever saviour /saint/sinner/baker butcher/candlestick maker they are referring too, to I simply state “I believe in myself”. This is something I have carried with me for a long time. I put all my “faith” in myself; everything I do or do not do is a direct result of my own free will. So when I perceive that I have failed at something I take it incredibly personally (as I am sure many of us do). When we are in this moment or state of mind it is incredibly hard to see the bigger, usually much more colourful picture.
I get a bit exhausted by people putting their faith in anything other than themselves. I personally find it completely bizarre when people leave their choices, path and sometimes their whole life up to a higher power, divine intervention or fate. Don’t get me wrong we all have the right to believe in whom or whatever the hell we like but where is the line drawn? When do we recognise our own achievements and our own choices as something we did, something we fought for or even something we fought against?
On so many occasions I have doubted my choices and as a result done nothing. The minute I started to believe in who I was and what I am capable of things began to change and fast. This is a little taste of what changes I have made in the last 18 months: I enrolled to do my Personal Trainer qualifications, 6 months later I had finished with flying colours. Another few months on I had quit my very stable well paying full time office job with the intention to start this blog, to start inspiring women and anyone who dares to dream or has a desire to lead a different or better life. The first post I released on my blog felt like the biggest leap of self-faith I have ever taken, my fingers trembled and all the crazy thoughts flooded my head, I was opening myself up to anyone who bothered to look and leaving myself wide open for criticism and judgement. In the last month I began training with an amazing trainer with the full intention of finally creating the healthy body I desire and deserve. These are just some of the big things; there have been some amazing little wins along the way and so many things in the pipeline to come. None of this would be possible if I didn’t believe I was capable (even just capable of trying) and then as a result made it happen.
Taking some of these steps scared the pants off me and it hasn’t all been smooth sailing. I have had setbacks on top of setbacks, jobs falling through, writers block (at least that’s what I am calling it – it was more writers fury… getting all the shit out), being short on money, overcoming the shear realisation that I am now in unknown territory and that alone almost paralysed me with fear (for a few days anyway). But underneath it all I now know I can do whatever I put my mind to.
Something you won’t catch me doing is saying the one of the most dreaded statements in the English language… “I can’t”. If you ever hear me say it please slap me (unless I’m doing burpees haha… kidding). Especially when it comes to training, I make a point to never let those words slip out. I may not be able to complete a full move or lift a certain weight but that by no means I will never be able to do it. If I work hard towards whatever it is and put in the necessary ground work, I WILL be able to do it. Recently I was mid-session with my trainer doing 1 & ¼ travelling lunge – my left side just wasn’t playing as nice as my right side. I was getting frustrated; my technique was diminishing as I was getting fatigued, I was feeling incredibly powerless and felt like I wanted to cry. I took a breath shut everything out for a quick moment and told myself “I’ve got this” (and continued to repeat it to myself quietly while I finished the set). Digging deep and finding that moment behind the tears of frustration that almost made it down my face (I am pretty tough so no tears were harmed during said training session) gave me back the control and momentum I needed to push through. Giving up was simply not an option.
With self-belief, fear takes a back seat, it will still be there but it no longer has control. Put to good use fear can be a very powerful tool but it simply will not win if your self-belief is strong and your commitment unwavering – cliché as it is “Where there is a will, there is a way” sums it up for me. Every day comes in Ebbs and flows, regardless of what you are doing. Finding that motivation within yourself to overcome the shitty bits and stand strong will see you rise above it and achieve more than you ever dreamed possible. Stop dwelling in the negative corners of your mind and make a choice to work on and change your beliefs about yourself. You Can!!
The importance of self-belief? If you believe you can do it, you will.